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Whether she lives on a farm in Bloemfontein, the busy streets of Johannesburg or the chilled suburbs of Cape Town, there's something really unique about the ladies in South Africa, and if you happen to find yourself infatuated with one, you can count yourself lucky. They can be feisty and take no prisoners, but they're also sweet enough for you to take home to your mom. So what should you expect when you're dating a Rooi Rok Bokkie? Of course, we're the Rainbow Nation, so we're all pretty different, but here's a little lighthearted and incredibly rough guideline for you if you've ever considered getting your very own Saffa girl, straight from the horse's mouth. South African ladies love it when you look treat her like a princess and also look after yourself, so if you're planning on taking one of them on a date, be sure you use the term "date" and not "hang out" and that you'll be the type of guy to open the door for her when you pick her up.

In their eyes, this is confirmed by the fact that I just so happen to have had two black girlfriends in a row. Never mind that every girlfriend I had before that was white.

4. Always Dress Right. This is one of those simple yet difficult dating rules that most women manage to mess up. The secret behind looking beautiful for a Author: Andile Smith. Jul 23,   7 things I've learnt about dating in South Africa. the real danger South African women face every day from men means going to a stranger's house to meet is a terrible idea. Men who do not Author: Yolisa Qunta. Jul 15,   A South African girl who doesn't like animals, isn't a true South African. We were born and bred to love our little puppies and kittens like they are our children, so if you fall in love with a girl from South Africa, be prepared to love her "children" just as much.

I suppose you might blame it all on the legacies of apartheid, but it's certainly not only my South African friends that are guilty. When I took my partner to England for the first time last year, an uncle reproached me for not "warning" him that she was black.

Even more strange, my English friends kept mistakenly calling my partner by my black ex-girlfriend's name. This is certainly not something that has ever happened when I've moved from one white girlfriend to another.

But suddenly, it seemed my partner was just "some other black girl" that I'd got with because Sometimes, people still just appear to feel that whatever our relationship is about it is just wrong for a white and a black to be together.

Full stop. Simple as that. These are the types who will openly shake their heads and turn up their noses. I always wonder what they would say if I asked them why they think it's wrong. I'm sure many of them wouldn't have an answer.

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Sadly, some other black women also seem to swallow the reductive narratives. When they discover I have a black partner, they'll suddenly start flirting with me.

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Again, they don't seem to stop to think that maybe I love my partner for who she is, not for her color. They just think I have a thing for "black girls" so therefore they also have a chance to be with me. Which of course is great for them, because they tell me that "white guys treat women better. Sadly, so many people seem so happy to flawlessly play out the stereotypes. Anyone who's ever been to Jo'Burg on Long Street will have seen various German men dotted around the fringes why is it always the Germans?

life. There's nothing

Then there are the fat, rich, old British men you see strolling around the Waterfront with beautiful black girls half their size and half their age. Initially, I get angry at all of these people for dirtying the image of what my partner and I are by association, but then I realize that this makes me just as judgmental as the people who judge us, or at the very least equally primed to jump to certain conclusions.

So I try to tell myself that maybe it isn't what it looks like. There also seems to be a basic assumption from various different sides of this conversation that as soon as someone appropriate of the same race comes along, my relationship with my partner will crumble.

I'll never forget the concerned look that a friend of mine gave me when my girlfriend struck up a very casual conversation with a black guy who happened to be standing next to us in a bar one night. It was as if my friend felt I couldn't compete with the mutual blackness this man and my partner shared, and that everything else paled excuse the pun in comparison.

for that interfere

I sometimes wonder how many people are scared of the idea of cross-racial dating or relationships by all of this nonsense - all the assumptions, stereotypes and judgments that they would have to deal with from other people. It's sad really.

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Many friends tell my partner and I that we are so lucky to have each other and to love each other like we do. But how many people in South Africa, and elsewhere no doubt, are dramatically reducing the pool from which they might be able to draw someone they really love, just by their inability to consider being with someone who happens to have a different skin color?

10 Fundamental Dating Rules For South African Girls

I'm not stupid enough to say things like "I don't see color," or to claim that there aren't differences between my girlfriend and I that are predicated on our respective races. But as far as I'm concerned, our differences - both the racial ones and all the others - are precisely what make our relationship so much more interesting and intricate than the reductive narratives that so many people try to project upon us.

Having said that, this doesn't mean that our differences define our relationship, for we are also so very similar in so many ways. The sooner that more people come to realize this the better - not only for us, but also for them.

You know You're a South African when...

This post originally appeared on the author's blog. US Edition U. Coronavirus News U.

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How to Date (Black) South African Girls

Terms Privacy Policy. At that point I decided if the internet was good enough for searching for cheap long-haul tickets, it was good enough for looking for the next person I want to watch Game of Thrones cuddled up next to. Given that there is still a gender pay gap between men and women, the man who made you leave your house should never expect the pretty one to reach for her wallet.

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If you factor in how much Mac lipstick costs, not to mention nice shoes, tasteful accessories and Uber, then technically the lady is out of pocket before the first morsel arrives. At all.

Debate your cheap friends about this because I am not entertaining this nonsense. Firstly, the real danger South African women face every day from men means going to a stranger's house to meet is a terrible idea.

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Secondly, why set the bar so low? Picture a few months down the line, when you want to attend the art show everyone is buzzing about and your significant other prefers to stay on the couch and binge watch series instead Think about it.

Why aren't they even trying to look friendly? How do we know they have teeth if they don't show them?

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Who told them that mugshot-looking pictures are appealing? A hard no to all of this.

absolutely not

You know that moment in horror movies when the beautiful but oblivious star is warned about the danger they are gaily skipping towards? Picture me as that sheriff of a one-horse town, trying to save you from impending doom.

Nothing, I repeat, nothing good ever comes from giving a stranger access to your inbox. At best it will lead to boring conversations that fizzle out, leaving you with no desire to meet the person in real life.

At worst you will get unsolicited pictures of some man's nether regions. Your data and eyeballs deserve better. The quickest way to elicit a barrage of questions is to let the world know you are looking for love in the modern manner. Work colleagues are curious about the people you meet online.

Aside from being generally crass, sexist, offensive and reeking of sour grapes, Jonno' article entirely failed to acknowledge that there is, in fact, such a thing as a BLACK South African "girl." Interestingly, even most of the numerous sources that have criticized this article have failed to acknowledge this gaping hole in a conversation (of.


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2 Comments

  1. Tygokree
    Goltikazahn

    Be mistaken.

    14.02.2020
    |Reply
  2. Samuktilar
    Vugis

    At me a similar situation. I invite to discussion.

    10.02.2020
    |Reply

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