Are not are my standards too high christian dating answer matchless
ScyllaTK haha Yes, I've had a long term relationship 2 years, almost three. I have these standards because of that relationship and others. Yes, I follow them myself. I was raised a Christian and seeking the best is what I aim for. But, ey I shouldn't really tell you how to live your life. If anyone can fit this standards, perfect for you!
That's what I will continue to tell myself. Dec 21, 5. You are free to set your standard and pursue the preferences you desire.
If your selectivity leads to complaints and sadness about limited options, you may want to fine tune them. I know what I can live with and what sets my soul aflame. I keep both in the forefront. Deviations have never ended well. I prefer the company of others with similar values and background. Common denominators are very important to me.
My deepest connections as friends and companions always hail from that group. Instead of casting my net wider, I narrowed it and placed my focus where the probability of success is greatest.
Are Your Dating Standards Too High?
High standards are a non issue. Dec 21, 6. Mine could be and they technically are for where I am currently in life. I'm basing my standards off of who I believe I can be in 5 years or so. Now if I don't fulfill my potential and become who I could be then maybe you could argue my standards were too high and i should just lower them and go with the women i attract now.
Not a bad idea but theres a few things i need to do to attract the women i want and live the life i know i am capable of living so i think i'm doing the right thing by waiting and setting reasonable standards. Dec 21, 7. Dec 21, 8. Lowering my standards rarely ends well.
As far as standards go, they're not unrealistic. They are perhaps a bit idiosyncratic, but if we're going to spend the rest of our lives together then it's more important that I find the right kind of woman for me. Agree x 1 List. Dec 21, 9. I think standards are useful to help keep your heart from making all the decision when it is in love.
It helps you decide who not to date in the first place so you dont fall in love with people you know you shouldnt be dating. Others help you recognize red flags for potential incompatility and get out of those relationships. They shouldnt read Iike a job resume though and except for the true deal breakers, be open to some variety that you didnt know you wanted. I'm looking for a christian and dont want to have kids.
I think just those two requirements significantly dwindles the men to choose from in sf. Humans are born to fail, it is assumed they will do things on this list, and therefore require asking forgiveness. I can't logically align that with the judgmental list of "if you do this, I can't love you. Boundaries, absolutely.
Judgment for being human, not so much. Plus, the ate contradicts the original list. HaveQuestions The ate is further explaining what the original list means to me. And, I accept everyone makes mistakes, I make them all the time, however, if we repent of them then it's ok.
If you go out and sin, on purpose, the Lord isn't so forgiving.
Are Your Standards For A Guy Too High?
You're mocking his sacrifice the atonement. Not at all.
You posted this, for others to comment on. Mocking would require me making fun of, or holding some kind of scorn for the religion. I don't. To claim I am mocking it, is a simple way to disregard alternative opinions. Thanks though. Like us all, there's always room for improvement :D I try and follow the bible as much as I can. I respect everyone and don't pass judgement on my friends.
I have a few friends who don't believe in any type of God, however, I respect them and they respects me. I just seek a husband who shares my views :D. If it was my exact clone I would of added more to the list and been a complete control freak about what he has to like, do, etc.
As a Christian, you seek someone who has your standards.
Dec 26, I know my standards are too high. I hold myself to very high standards (that I often cannot meet and then I browbeat myself over it), and I hold other people to high standards as well. It takes years just to reach the point where someone can count themselves a 'friend' of mine. Well, we're here to set the record straight and see if you really know where your priorities are at or if your standards are simply way too high. The world of dating is already hard enough as it is, and we don't want you to be your own worst obstacle. Jun 25, Are My Standards Too High for Finding Love? - Read about Christian dating and get advice, help and resources on Christian single living. Dan says he .
Simple :. No you're basically looking for someone who is the exact same as you. Let me guess, you've never had a relationship have you?
Actually I have had relationships. One of them lasted for two and a half years. Hmm was he your exact clone though? That list is a list of deal breakers, not a list of qualities. You have a very negative list. He wasn't, not even close. However, I gave him a chance and, because of him, I have this list. I did write down a few positive things in the ate. Your list is taking life very very seriously.
Haha not at all. I have these standards before of previous dating experiences.
Are my standards too high christian dating
The reason why I say that is because a lot of the list does a great job of making sure you won't find anyone, so therefore it becomes a self fulfilling prophecy. Perfect if you are emotionally unavailable or afraid of intimacy.
I do want to find someone but I would like them on my level so it will involve less fights and disappointment. I have these "standards" because of previous dating experiences. It's good to find other Christian on here :. Just be careful not to be too judgmental. We're not perfect either. Far from it. Have you done any of these things on the list before? Just curious because I know I have in the past but I have repented.
I had a porn addiction once but not anymore. I've lied but not a relationship lie. I've sexted before. I swear on the odd occasion but not excessively. That's some of my faults or past faults.
It's comforting to know other Christians face similar battles sometimes. Have you done any of these? Actually you don't have to say. But I'm glad I'm not the only one who's messed up before. I was brought up a Christian since birth. But honestly I get where you're coming from and agree with you. I only want a relationship with devine connections. Oh I know. I'm far from perfect myself and I won't judge anyone who has sinned in the past, because I have too.
I had sexual relations before marriage but has since repented. I only swear when I'm mad. I've never been addicted to porn I'm highly against it. I only tell white lies, not HUGE lies or made stuff up.
Haha I'm so similar. Yeah I only swear when I'm mad and have told white lies. Haven't had sex but I wouldn't judge someone who has. I'm actually highly against porn too. It puts you in an unrealistic fantasy and is poison to the mind. People think it's harmless but it's not. I'm glad I kicked the habit. I don't drink and have never smoked.
So yeah I wanna get it right too. So true! Porn is so damaging to the mind, and I feel super sorry for the women in porn. Porn is sex trafficking and most of the women are barely legal, or not at all. Also true, it isn't harmless like people think it is. I was, yes, he would pressure me into sexual intercourse. I was so blinded with love that I thought he would someday marry me too, like he said he would. But, like most things that left his mother, was a lie : But I took the experience and changed my ways.
Aw I'm sorry. I understand it's easy to get caught up in the moment especially if you're in love. Was he a Christian guy? But yeah you're right.
I think when we learn from these experiences it makes us stronger. He said he was Christian but his actions and words seemed far from it.
I gave him heaps of chances to change but he never did. I am twice as stronger than before :. Ohh one of those. Yeah I have a family member who dated someone like that. I think he said it just to please her but he had no intentions of changing.
They actually got married but it didn't last long. So you're lucky it didn't get that far.
Standards Too High: If you haven't given much thought to your own values, then your standards of a woman who has full integrity may be too high. Similarly, if you have thought about your values, but your life is quite disconnected from them, are your standards too high there? Yes, they could be. No one is perfect but your standards aren't too high. You're Christian entitled to your own preference.
How did you meet him? Yeah, I knew it wouldn't going to lead to marriage and, if it did, I knew I would be unhappy. That's super sad about your family member. Hopefully they're doing better now : I met him at a Mormon church I'm a former Mormon. Yeah but I know what it's like wanting something to work out even though you know it really can't.
It's hard sometimes because we're still human with the same fleshly desires like anyone else. Oh yeah she's fine now. She re-married a Christian guy and has 2 kids. I've been brought up a pentecostal type Christian.
What's your current living situation?
True, true but I honestly thought he would of married me since we were sexually active and it wasn't right, but he didn't share the same views I did. However, I am rather glad we didn't get married. I honestly couldn't see myself with someone like him, looking at it now. Oh that's great! It gives me hope that I will find someone too :D.
Well I'm a strong believer of "there's someone for everyone" sooo I hope you find your guy! Unmarried Christian who isn't a virgin with a shopping list of requirements for a man. Who wouldn't be excited to try to meet those requirements? That's not a hypocritical pain in the ass aaaat aaaaalllll.
I've made mistakes myself and I've repented for them. I am not seeking a virgin. I am seeking someone who understands how it's important to not sleep around with everyone. S I am a Christian too. That's why I have these standards. No one is perfect. Vote A. Having high standards is great.
Vote B. Vote C. I don't know. The third woman and I like each other, but she lives about 90 minutes away in light traffic. Great email, thank you.
Where are your standards currently, and what specifically would you consider lowering? Good question, I made a list a while back. I used to want a professional woman who is ambitious and has more hobbies than Netflix and drinking. Sometimes if I wonder if I should lower my beauty standards. At the same time, I want a partner who is normal-sized. Does that make sense? What do you think I should do going forward?
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Skip to content. By Sarah Jones. So, what to do? Fixed Versus Flexible Characteristics Tied to Standards In terms of your lifestyle, quality of life, emotional health, social wellbeing financial sturdiness, career, age, and place in life, some parts of you are fixed, and some parts are flexible.
Standards Too Low: If you find that people are taking advantage of you in any part of your life work, social life, family, romancenotice that.
Social Lifestyle and Family Desires Why This Matters: Your relationships will be happiest when your needs and desires are met inside and outside of the relationship, according to what those needs are and what makes sense to fill them! Standards Too High: If you want a woman to be your entire world, then are your standards too high?
Areas that are not worth sacrificing are Wanting to have kids or not have kids Close proximity to loved ones or distance Desire for nomadic life versus locational stability Emotional Maturity in Relationship Why This Matters: Hand-in-hand with quality of life and lifestyle is interpersonal relating. Standards Too Low: If you are measured and responsible with your emotional expression, but you keep attracting people who are all over the place, then perhaps your standards are too low.
Physical Presentation Why This Matters: Your physical presentation is the way you present yourself to the world. Standards Too Low: If you are in-process with your presentation improvement journey, then you are a match with women who are also in-process, not women who are not actively in-process. Or I need to lower my standards. Sarah Jones. Pick up your free copy of Sarah's page ebook inside the blue box just below.
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